Understanding women in relationships is both a simple and sophisticated topic. Let’s start with the simple stuff:
A woman who needs a man will go out and find the best man she can get and win his heart.
She’ll make it happen, even if she has to compromise a bit here and there in terms of her “ideal”.
And once she has you, she’s more likely to hang on to you.
That doesn’t mean she’ll never fight with you, of course – just the opposite! But she’ll be more likely to remain with you once each fight has ended if she truly needs you.
In contrast, a woman who merely wants a man will be very picky. She’s in no rush to close the deal. She can take her time looking. And if she finds a good catch, she’ll often balk at closing the deal lest she miss a chance to find an even better prospect that might happen by next week or next month.
And if she does get a man and he fails to live up to her standards, she’ll start looking for his replacement pretty quickly.
Such women are effectively seeking perfection or something close to it. A woman like this might only be a 7 or a 5 or a 3 (and depreciating rapidly) in terms of her desirability to men, but she’ll still believe that she deserves a guy who is at least a 9. That’s the “man shortage” which so many women grumble about … the shortage of desirable men who are seeking much less desirable women. The hot guys are passing them over in favor of hotter women.
There are occasional books and articles in the press and Internet which examine the stresses that arise when a wife’s income exceeds that of her man. And it’s not a pretty picture, if you’re that guy.
And there also seem to be quite a few articles exploring the topic of “Where Have All the Good Men Gone?” These always explore the travails of thirty-something women who have seen it all and done it all, and who now grumble about why they can’t seem to find a husband. We can’t speak for you, but after reading those sorts of articles, we have no trouble at all imagining why those women might have been unable to close the deal.
In fact, each of those articles leads us to the same conclusion: If you’re looking for marital longevity, be very cautious about picking a woman who’s already prosperous. You’ll have a far tougher time holding on to her and far less fun spending time with her than if you pick out a woman of more modest means who’s actually willing to give as well as get.
In our experience, we’ve usually had the most fun (once out of the university and into a normal work environment) with women of modest means. That means waitresses, clerks, and the like.
We’ve had the least fun with the women who were prosperous (professionals, executives and managers. It wasn’t true 100% of the time, but the pattern held often enough that we took it into account when prospecting for “new talent”.
Keep that in mind when you’re hunting for your next partner around town. It’s never too late to begin improving your understanding of women in relationships.
About Mack Doppler:
Like so many other guys just learning about women, Mack was initially the classic “nice guy” and struck out consistently. But en route to earning degrees in Psychology and Business, he took a year off to work on the lighting for rock concerts in California and got his first taste (and quite a few additional servings) of “groupie sex”.
As you can imagine, that very enjoyable experience showed him a very different side of women that no one had ever told him about when he was growing up. It also broadened his thinking about women — including what they’ll do under the right circumstances.